Do you ever have that moment? That moment when you FINALLY do something you have been avoiding, procrastinating on. You can feel the pride bubbling up. The relief for finally answering the inner calling. The anticipation of being able to call something from your 6-month-old to-do list DONE.
And then modern technology steps in. She takes one wrong mouse-click, and wipes out all your hard work. I had 3/4 of a blog post written this morning. 3/4. That’s as good as done. After six months of completely inexcusable delay, I was moments from satisfying the inner-mockings of my mind, quieting the annoying (albeit necessary) little voice inside that pushes me beyond my comfort zone, into the magic of the unknown. I was right. There.
And then? Poof. Gone. Vamoose.
It was brilliant, I tell you. Brilliant. And yet, you’ll have to take my word for it, because the words I had written you will never know.
Now, I will be fair. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in life, it’s how much power we hold in our ability to see things differently, to look at the whole picture, not just our initial, narrow view. And with that in mind, while I will say that it was sheer brilliance I was spilling onto the page (a tragic literary loss, indeed), I will admit, that it was also probably a little heavy. It was probably a little on the existential, introspective, oh-so-philosophical side.
And now that it’s gone (or, achem, more like “involuntarily let go of”), I can do one of a few things. I can:
1) Whine and moan and leave things status-quo, and refuse to create a new post because I already lost my first attempt at doing so, and why would I ever continue???
2) Whine and moan and try to re-create the post, and be frustrated that it doesn’t sound nearly as lyrical and full of genius as my first pass, and be forever upset that it will never echo the truth of my sentiments as I laid them out in my initial attempt
3) Go with the flow, jump for joy, and take the opportunity to make this post that much more fun and interesting, and improve upon the overly-heavy tone of my first attempt
Yep, we call that making lemonade, folks!
The post I started earlier this morning may be lost indeed. As are the last six months. Well, not lost, but certainly gone. They go SO fast, don’t they??
Each day it feels like, if you stop at the end to recall and recount, notice and acknowledge the things you’re grateful for, is filled – so filled, it can almost be overwhelming at times. When you’re close to it, you can remember every suble nuance, every comment that made you laugh, every moment that made you cry; the details of the unfolding of each, miraculous event.
It’s a lot like enjoying a cup of your most favorite, most cherished coffee. When it’s fresh in your mind, so recently experienced, you can recall every subtle flavor, every wave of complexity, every aroma rising off of the team, every aspect of it, right down to the weight and the grittiness on your tongue.
And then time passes. You taste a lot more coffees. And suddenly, all of those specifics have washed away, and you’re left with an overall impression. “I LOVE that coffee!” or “Oh, yeah, I was not really a fan of that one.”
It reminds me of the old Maya Angelou quote, “People won’t remember what you said…they’ll forget what you did…but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
We forget the details. We remember the feelings.
Coffee is a lot like that. So is life. And the best part is, we get to choose how we drink our coffee, just like we get to choose how we live.
We can live a life lost in the details, grasping for the things we cannot control. Or we can live a life found in feelings, enjoying every moment of this ride that is so completely outside of any kind of control.
Do you live a life lost, or live a life found?
Wishing everyone joy, love, and peace this holiday season…and may 2013 be a year for many more of us to live a life found.